What do I mean by this?
I fear that I will work so hard, spend so much money, and it will all be for nothing. I fear that I will forever be the short fat girl. This thought has always been in my head and even when I push it away, it comes back and I give up...again. I have been on this road for years now, so I would have hoped to see myself losing but instead I have gained. I find it hard to believe people anymore that say it will happen because their words just sound like words of pity to me, even though I know they mean well.
I think the problem I face that I can't break is that I am a visual person meaning that if I can't see the change, I feel like I am failing and I give up. I have been trying to have patience but it is becoming an uphill battle that I am losing. I just want to see something, anything but I don't and I just feel like giving up again and be done with it.
But I can't because if I do I might as way through my life away.
To not change would mean I will forever hate myself.
I've never really had
So what does mean for me now?
No I'm not giving up but I have lost some of my will, besides I can't give up just yet I'm in a 6 month contract with my gym hehe. Is this the feeling that others have felt in their own journey? The feeling that after all the blood, sweat, and tears that they will have gone nowhere. Well I guess if weight loss was easy we wouldn't be faced with an obesity epidemic.